It’s been a very long time since I have sat down to type anything, let alone enter my workroom to create. A lot has gone on since I last posted. To help show exactly what I have been going through, I will use one of my Tarot decks, and also one of my favorite oracle decks. The cards shown here read from left to right in order of events and things that occurred.
The tower moment…
A couple of months ago I went through a time which the Tarot world commonly refers to as a “tower moment.” Before this moment occurred, I was very focused on building my business, planning every moment of my day out, doing nothing but planning photos, posting on social media, and trying to figure out what I wanted to do next in terms of clothing line etc. I was so damn wrapped up in the material world, that I became blind to the gifts of the spiritual realm (4 of cups) I had become so stressed out, weary, and dissatisfied with everything. This was just not me. I know some people enjoy hours on end of posing for photos, caking on makeup, and dimming their light in order to fit in and be accepted, but that is just not my style, nor has it ever been. I realized quickly that I was losing touch with who I really was, and I didn’t like it one bit. I love to design, and I genuinely like to sew and create, but not like that. I was ignoring my true self, and also other talents I have been putting on the back burner for years.
Many shadowy behaviors were coming to light all around me (The Moon) and I felt that I had come upon a time in which I needed to delve deep into my subconscious self, and find out what it is that I really wanted. The moon card is associated with Pisces, which is also my sun sign, and the moon is all about reflection, dreams, romance, femininity, intuition, the unconscious, the subconscious, and cycles. I love to work with moon energy! So I have spent many a night focusing on the waxing, and waning cycles and focusing my energies into finding my next steps. The moon card also has to do with darkness, deception, hidden enemies and secrets. It was time to confront certain people, situations, and feelings I had been holding back for years. I unleashed them, and this allowed me to move forward. It felt GREAT.
The High Priestess card represents me…seriously. It is literally my card according to numerology.This card is all about intuition, psychic ability, spirituality, wisdom, depth, The unveiled future, depth, tenacity, revelation, silence, and secrets. I’m just going to say this….I am very “Clair” inclined. (If you want to now what “Clair” means CLICK HERE) I have always been extremely aware of my surroundings, people’s thoughts, and feelings. I have prophetic dreams on the regular, and I have predicted many things before they happened. To be an empath, as well as having more than one “clair” ability heightened, can be both a blessing and a curse. It’s a blessing because it has kept me out of danger several times, but a curse in that I will know when I walk into a room who the assholes are…I can literally feel it! I also know when people bullshit…and it’s laughable for them to think I don’t know it, especially when a person straight up lies to my face. It’s like “who the hell do you think you are fooling? I have news for you! ONLY YOURSELF!”
After my tower moment I would never be able to look at the world in the same way again (the hanged man) The veil was now lifted and I was literally vibrating at a different level. If you have ever experienced a Kundalini awakening, you will know what I speak of. In order for me to reach this point, I had to get to know and respect my shadow self. To do so, I spent much time journaling and calling upon Kali Ma, and Freyja to help destroy old ties and bonds from this life, as well as past lives spent here on earth, and other places and dimensions in the universe. I withdrew myself from all regular routines- hence no social media or blog activity (The Hermit card). I meditated with spirit guides, archangels, and ascended masters. I asked for guidance and strength. Through this spiritual “me time” I was able to forgive and release a lot (Judgement card). I have heard the call to follow my own path! Like a butterfly, the old me retreated to her cocoon, allowing for transformation into the person I have become. (Death card)
A “stellar” time….
The cards depicted here are really quite self explanatory. Starting at age three, I have remembered and been aware of past lives. (If you want to hear about those, I could write a separate blog post about them) I know this life is one of many I have had, and not all of them were here (hence the Starseed and Pleiades cards). Because I have always known this fact, I have always felt like a stranger in a strange land. It has been a difficult road in dealing with this, but I have come to learn balance (temperance) and have hope and faith (star card) I feel part of my purpose for being here is to help others, and inspire them to have compassion for themselves, as well as every living being on earth. Learn to have gratitude for everything…such as the water you drink, and the food you eat. To not respect what you literally consume, shows a great disrespect for yourself. You become what you eat…think about that a moment. This is just a small step that can literally change your life. The Magician card as well as Temperance show that I am coming into my power through control of my inner workings as well as my surroundings. I have the ability to manifest what I need or desire, and so I head off into the future (chariot). I have the will and the drive, as well as control and direction.
Birthing of a new age….
The Empress card is one of my favorite cards in the deck. She is pregnant with abundance, and ideas! She is all about creative energy, nurturing, and growth. She sits on her throne outdoors surrounded by the beauty of nature. The woman is my jam! I am all about that motherly vibe. She is inspiring to me! This is where I feel I am now. I am ready to give birth to new projects, and take my creativity to a new level (as well as a new direction!) I am very optimistic and filled with enthusiasm (the sun card) I have clarity in what it is that I feel and want from my life. The ten of cups card is another favorite of mine. This card literally depicts my family life. They are my love, and my insides. They are my fellow star children and I love them always…no matter what time, era, planet, or dimension we may continue on to…I will always and forever hold them in my heart and soul. The fool card is all about new beginnings, fresh starts, originality, adventure, freedom and excitement. To feel free to be myself is utterly amazing. The weight on my shoulders has been lifted, and off I travel into the world. I am taking that leap!
From now on….
From now on this blog is going to come straight from the heart. I’m not aiming to format my blog to “follow the crowd” and do what others do, just because society inflicts unrealistic standards to conform. I’m not about that life. I will be posting content that I find interesting, helpful, or inspiring. If I post anything about fashion, it will be fashion that I actually enjoy. I will be shooting photos that I like to create, such as moody, artistic, nature centered, and fun to look at themes! I am done posting about future projects and ideas. When I am done with something I am working on, I will share it, and not until then. If I have items I create that will be sold, then they will go into my shop and I will post about it on this blog! (And yes…If you look at the menu, there is actually a shop button!)
This has been a lengthy blog post, so I am going to wrap it up now. If you have any questions, or ideas in which you want to share, then comment below.